BROKEN HEART by Edgar De Leon
Two weeks after moving in with my mother in law, I got an interview. I was so excited but the job was a part time job. I didn't care because I was not working and all I wanted was to work as soon as possible. When I got to the interview it turned out to be a full time position but it was the third shift, night shift. I accepted the offer and went home to tell the news to my wife. Honestly, I didn't want to work night shifts but since she was ok with me working nights I went ahead and worked. I was working nights and my wife was working mornings. It was hard for both of us because we hardly saw each other and it seemed like we did not talk anymore. While I was sleeping she was working, and while I was working she was sleeping. It was the same thing over and over again, everyday.
Almost a year passed by, living in that situation, a routine that was hard to break. We only had one car and I always left the car to her. She will drop me off at night at work and she will pick me up in the morning. Then, one day I felt weird, something wasn't right. Sometimes she showed up late to pick me up at work, half asleep and complaining about how tired she was. After some days of the same thing, I got tired of waiting for her so I told her I was gonna drive myself to and from work. Then she decided to buy a motorcycle, her excuse was because she needed something to move around and we couldn't afford another vehicle. Which I just said fine. Then little by little I started to notice more things, she was acting weird towards me. When I wanted to joke around with her she was just serious and when I messed with her, she would ask me to put my hands to myself.
One morning, when I got home from work, I noticed the muffler of her motorcycle was hot. It seemed like she just got home from somewhere and it started to happen more often. I decided to check the phone bill, since we have both of our phones in the same contract and I was able to see the income calls and outgoing calls. I saw a number that repeated itself multiple times, it wasn't one that I recognized so I called to see who would answer and to my surprise it was a guy. I hung up right away and I didn't know what to do. I was so mad, so furious that I couldn't even think right. My mind was going crazy. I waited for my wife to come home to ask her about it. When she finally got home I confronted her, she did not say a single word. I called the guy next and asked him if he knew my wife or talked to her at all, to which he admitted to knowing her. She was still speechless. It was clear to me she was cheating on me. So I took all my belongings and went to my parents house. I felt horrible, I felt like I had a hole in my chest, deep inside I was hurt, it is a feeling that can not be explained.
Everything hit me hard. I wanted to smoke, have a beer, I wanted something to ease my pain but something in my mind was telling me not to do it. Somehow I started to feel like I needed to get close to God, I felt like I needed to go to church or read the bible. Something inside of me was telling me that it was gonna be ok, I just needed to come to Him. When I got home one day, I opened the bible and the first thing I saw was "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." (Psalms 147:3). It gave some peace, I felt I was going towards the right path. I took some time for myself, I was struggling with my feelings. Part of me wanted her back but I knew deep inside it wasn't going to be the same. I started to go to church, made new friends, read the bible and little by little God started to show His love towards me. I gave my life to Jesus. I felt good from inside, I felt complete. Every time I was feeling down, I would pray and I knew God was there with me. The empty hole I felt when my heart got broken, I didn't feel it anymore. It is a beautiful experience when you feel God.
Healing didn't come overnight, it took time. It still hurt when I thought about it or talked about it. After finding myself, I realized I had to let go so I can move on with my life, so I got divorced. I remembered when I was going through that, I couldn't understand why it happened to me. I had so many unanswered questions and I didn't know how I was going to overcome the situation. But now I understand everything. Now I look back and laugh about it and I'm glad I went through that. I know somebody out there is facing the same thing, maybe it is you. God places us in hard situations so we can become better people. He is preparing us for something bigger. He wants the best for us, but sometimes, we are so stubborn and we make our own ways. Other times, He takes away obstacles so we can have a relationship with Him. God has a purpose for all of us.
Today, I can say I have a beautiful family. God gave me a new life and a new meaning in life, I think I wouldn't be here if I wouldn't have gone through that experience. It hurt like hell but in the end it was all worth it.
God bless you!
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